Songs of the Black Forest
Ute and Artur in Antigua in August 1980
It all began in August 1980 on the island of Antigua. Most of the tourists had already fled the Caribbean to avoid hurricane season. Thanks to a sweet deal from Eastern Airlines, we found ourselves basking in the sun on one of the island's postcard beaches. It felt like our own private strand of white sand and palm trees. And then another couple arrived, speaking German. . .
We learned they were from Gaggenau, a small town on the edge of the Germany's famous Black Forest. Her name was Ute (ooh'-tuh) and she knew a little bit of English. Her husband, Artur, spoke no English at all. Since Sharon and I didn't know any German, Ute was our only hope for communicating. Not exactly ideal conditions for beginning a long-term friendship.
We mentioned that we were staying at the nearby Admiral's Inn and they expressed an interest in seeing the historic property. They seemed like nice people, so we invited them to join us for dinner. Despite the language challenges, it turned out to be a great evening, filled with stories and laughter. After dinner, we exchanged contact info and promised to keep in touch.
Of course, in 1980, there was no email, no texting, no social media and no WhatsApp. To reach someone overseas, you either telephoned or wrote a letter. Given the high cost of international calls, the best option was generally airmail. It seemed unlikely that we would be receiving many letters from Germany.
But then, after we returned to California, Ute's first letter arrived. It was written in broken English and filled with charming errors. Still, there was no doubt about her primary goals. She wanted to improve her English and she wanted to become real friends with the American couple they met in Antigua. Sharon wrote back to her and offered to correct Ute's letters with a red pen and mail them back to her. It turned out Ute loved this idea. Soon, they began writing regularly and Ute's English began to improve.
As the years flew by, we learned Ute and Artur loved to travel and dreamed of visiting California someday. In 1991, they realized that dream by touring the western states in a rented camper. When they stopped in Santa Barbara for a couple of days, it was wonderful to see them again.
Artur, Sharon and Ute on the beach in Santa Barbara, 1991
The advent of email and online translations continued to make communicating easier. But the news wasn't always good. In 1993, after more than 20 years together, Ute and Artur separated. They were divorced a year later. It wasn't long before Ute began mentioning a new boyfriend, Klaus, in her messages.
Ute, Klaus and Sharon in Santa Barbara, 1995
Things moved quickly and, in 1995. Ute and Klaus embarked on their own California camper adventure with a visit to Santa Barbara. It was great to see Ute again and we both liked Klaus immediately. They seemed perfect for each other. It was no surprise to hear they were married in Vancouver seven years later, in 2002.
Klaus, Sharon and Ute at our arrival in Germany in 2011
We didn't see them again until 2011 when we stopped in Germany during an extended European trip. They greeted our train by waving flags and running along the tracks as we arrived at the station. We were all happy to see each other. The highlight of our stay in Gaggenau was a special gathering that included not only Ute, Klaus and Ute's mom but also Ute's first husband, Artur, and his wife, Angelika. It was a lot of fun and great to see Artur again!
Angelika, Artur, Sharon, Klaus, Ute and her mom in Gaggenau, 2011
During our next two trips to Europe, in 2015 and 2019, Ute and Klaus came to Paris to spend a few fun days exploring the city together. Klaus, like Artur, spoke only German but Ute’s new fluency in English made conversing much easier.
Klaus and Ute at the Paris Métro, leaving for home in 2019
Fast forward to 2023. Ute and Klaus announced their plans to return to Vancouver in September to celebrate their 21st wedding anniversary. We were planning to join them when we received some unsettling news from Ute on July 17th.
She had been having some breathing problems and her cardiologist advised her that the aortic valve in her heart needed repair. They cancelled their trip to Canada and the surgery was scheduled for August 4th. Her doctor was confident and assured her she would feel much better after the operation. But Ute and Klaus were scared. And so were we.
Then the unthinkable happened. There were unexpected complications. The surgery took eight hours and Ute's weakened heart was unable to beat on its own. She was placed in intensive care with the hope that she could gain some strength and recover. Klaus and her niece, Sabrina, were at her side during visiting hours for six days.
Klaus provided us with email updates as we continued to hope for good news. Then, on August 10, he sent us a brief note in German, "Sie ist heute morgen von uns gegangen." As we ran it through the translator, the terrible truth appeared, "She left us this morning."
It was devastating. We had known Ute for more than 40 years and, suddenly, she was gone. I lost a wonderful friend and Sharon lost someone so close they called each other "sisters". The greatest tragedy was that Klaus lost the love of his life just weeks before they had planned to celebrate their anniversary. As you can imagine, he was absolutely heartbroken.
Through the years, we had exchanged many little gifts through the mail with our German friends. The last one we received from Ute was a Zwitscherbox, a small wooden box containing a recording of songbirds in the Black Forest. The sounds are motion-activated so that every time you pass by, the birds begin to sing.
It's always bittersweet to hear them. They remind us of our treasured friend, Ute, and how lucky we were to have met her in Antigua so many years ago. You can hear some of these beautiful songs of the Black Forest in the video clip below.
And that's the way the story goes.
Songs of the Black Forest